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What are Inscriptions? 

When you lose a loved one, it can be a difficult decision choosing the right words to put on a headstone. Inscriptions, also commonly referred to as an epitaph, are a short message inscribed on the headstone. They traditionally incorporate the person’s name, birth date and death date. Here at Cope Memorials, we know how difficult it can be to attain exactly what you are looking for, so we’re happy to adapt any inscriptions, allowing you to make it as personal as you’d like. 

The Purpose of a Headstone Inscription

The main purpose of a headstone inscription is to honour your loved one. They remind you of the life that they lived and what they meant to you. If you’re religious, this can be done through a piece of prose or a reference from the Bible. Contrastingly, you can have non-religious poems, lyrics from a song, or you can even make it up from scratch. It’s also vital that we discuss the materials that you choose for your memorial as some work better with bigger, flowing letters which may reduce the number of words able to fit on the headstone.

If you haven’t had requests from your loved one before they pass, it’s advised to take your time when choosing the headstone and inscription. Emotions are understandably heightened during this time and inscriptions are a permanent feature. This time allows your emotions to settle and you can remember your loved one more clearly, resulting in a timeless headstone. 

A Guide on Choosing an Inscription

• Sometimes, less is more and the fewer words inscribed can really make a lovely tribute. Epitaphs are traditionally short and concise, mostly due to the limited space available on headstones. 

• Consider whether you want it to be in first, second or third person. Most inscriptions are written in first person (I, we) often coming from a relative, a friend, or the deceased. It’s important to think about whether you’d like the inscription to speak directly to someone, either a passer-by or the loved one themselves. This type of inscription can bring great comfort. 

• As suggested before, you can take inspiration from anything. Particularly poems, lyrics from their favourite song. It’s also common to choose a snippet from a poem which was read out at their funeral. Most importantly, it’s beneficial to create an uplifting epitaph, if it celebrates their life it’s more likely to bring you peace when you visit. 

Examples

Take a look at our ‘inscription ideas’ page where we give several examples of inscriptions. We break it down into sections, making it easier to navigate the order of the inscription. Additionally, you can look at photos of headstones that we have skilfully inscribed. 

Cope Memorials

Choosing the inscription for your loved one can seem daunting but it needn’t be. Here at Cope Memorials, we offer expert advice and can guide you through the process. We’re a family run stonemasons with over 110 years of experience. We pride ourselves on offering our customers an exceptional and considerate service each and every time. You can contact us via our online contact form, or give us a call on 01773 602 187.

While we can carry the memories of our loved ones that have passed with us everyday, one of the main reasons why people choose to have a headstone is so they can have a permanent place to go. They can reflect on the moments and good times that they spent with that person. Headstones are often a final gesture of love that concludes their journey together.

Therefore, loved ones take pride in their headstones, often laying fresh flowers nearby and making sure it is looking its best. Although, it must be pointed out that headstones should not be cleaned more than once a year. With that being said, here are some ways to clean headstones properly.

How to Clean Headstones

First and foremost, assess the headstone for any signs of flaking, crumbling or cracking. If so, it’s advised to not use any hard-thistle brushes, scraping motions or power washing (such as a jet wash) as this can increase the damage, resulting in a trickier recovery method. Generally, clean water and a soft cloth should do the job for most dirt and marks. Once you’ve washed the headstone, it’s vital to use a soft dry cloth in order to stop streaks being left on the headstone. A soft-thistle brush may be used in a gentle orbital motion from bottom to top for deeper marks. Harder to reach areas such as the meaningful engraved memorials can be cleaned using a cotton bud and clean water.

What Not To Use For Cleaning Headstones

Generic household products such as bleach should be avoided as it can cause brown staining overtime. Additionally, other household products which may be mentioned as a ‘hack’ such as vinegar, shaving cream, vinegar should never be used to clean headstones. This is due to most headstones being porous, meaning they absorb liquids and moisture, resulting in staining as they also absorb the colouring from these products. 

Maintaining The Headstone

While we’ve discussed ways in which headstones can be cleaned, the best way to maintain the headstone is to look out for natural, organic materials that can be removed promptly to avoid staining over time. Things such as grass cuttings, leaves, pollen from flowers can all affect headstones if simply left. When seen, they should be removed immediately as the headstone can absorb the colouring. Furthermore, keep a look out for materials such as metal florist wire and containers that are either on or near the headstone, as these materials can rust, which can also cause staining over time. 

Cope Memorials

While some feel comfort in maintaining their loved ones’ headstone, if you’re wanting a helping hand with any renovations, cleaning or additional inscriptions we can help here at Cope Memorials. We offer a free quote on all of these services. Please don’t hesitate to get in contact with us either through our contact form, or give us a call on 01773 602187. We provide our services across Derby, Nottingham, Chesterfield and Burton on Trent.

Losing a loved one affects everyone in different ways. No matter how someone may react to a loved one’s passing, it’s no secret that the pain and sorrow that follows can really take its toll both mentally and physically.

While sadly, there is no hard and fast rule to recovering from grief, there are some proven methods that can help you on your way. So with that being said, here are three effective ways to deal with grief.

1. Surround Yourself With Loved Ones

One of the best ways to deal with grief is to make sure that you are surrounded by friends and loved ones. Being able to share your grief with someone who is going through the same thing can be a cathartic experience for all involved.

Even if the people you are around did not know the deceased personally, simply being in the presence of people you can trust will allow you to express your emotions in a comfortable, open environment.

2. Counselling

Also known as bereavement therapy, grief counselling can be an extremely effective way of dealing with grief. Grief counsellors are experts in navigating people away from mourning and towards returning to a clearer state of mind. 

This type of counselling comes in three forms depending on what you need. Standard grief therapy helps you deal with behavioural and physical problems you may be experiencing. Complicated grief therapy is for when the grief proves to be particularly tough to shake off, causing you to find it difficult to move on with life without your loved one. Finally, traumatic grief therapy is for those who are showing signs of trauma as a result of someone’s passing.

3. Preserve Memories

While it is important to be able to move on with your life after the passing of a loved one, this does not mean that the deceased needs to be forgotten about. In fact, the opposite is true. Creating some kind of memorial that is a dedication to the loved one can be a great way of showing remembrance while moving away from grief.

Whether it comes in the form of planting a tree in their honour, placing a bench in their favourite park or creating some other kind of physical memorial is a method often used by people struggling with grief. This way you always have a place to visit whenever you want to feel close to them.

Contact Cope Memorials

We hope that this article was helpful and provided some insight into ways that you can conquer grief. 

If you would like to contact Cope Memorials, you can give us a call on 01773 602187 or you can fill out our online contact form.

While not a prerequisite of a funeral service, the repass provides an excellent opportunity for friends and family to get together. After the sombre mood that normally accompanies a funeral service, the post-funeral reception often offers people the chance to reminisce in a more relaxed environment. Below, we’ve assembled some of the primary reasons for holding a repass after a funeral service.

A chance to laugh

Often, the actual funeral service is a sad occasion, with little room for smiling and joking. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with conduction a more light-hearted funeral service, but most of the time the occasions are dominated by feelings of sadness. The repass represents an opportunity for people to laugh, smile, and remember their lost one fondly.

An opportunity to relax

Hand in hand with the opportunity to laugh and smile comes our next point. Generally speaking, the reception after a funeral will be held in a less formal environment. Where a church or crematorium might be used for certain services, the repass is often held in restaurants or homes. Simply, this change in environment allows for a more relaxing atmosphere, as opposed to the formal feeling created at the official service.

A repass is personal

As we mentioned above, the post-funeral reception allows for further personal touches to be added to the service. Hosting food and drinks at a family member’s home, or the person’s favourite restaurant can provide an extra personal touch. If food and drinks aren’t desired, then simply gathering at a place of meaning after the service is an excellent gesture and mark of respect.

Cope Memorials

If you’re unsure about any other aspects of the funeral service, you might consider looking through the rest of our blog page. On there, you will find a number of pieces offering helpful advice about elements such as the eulogy, and about choosing the right memorial. We provide our services across Derby, Nottingham, Chesterfield and Burton on Trent.

If you’d like to know more about the memorials services we offer here, we advise you to contact us. We are available on 01773 602 187, or can be reached online via our online contact form.

Headstones are incredibly personal, and should always be tailored to the person they’re commemorating. In addition to the inscription, shape, and flowers on a memorial, though, it’s extremely important to seriously consider the implications of the material you use.

Granite

Granite remains one of the most reliable and popular materials for building headstones. A granite headstone is extremely strong, and provides a number of options in terms of appearance. With a range of colours available, there’s plenty of scope to personalise the piece while always maintaining the iconic, timeless style that granite provides. Finally, the durability of granite seals its reputation as one of the best materials for headstones.

Marble

Marble headstones are, again, relatively diverse. They offer plenty of versatility when it comes to appearance, allowing for white, grey, and black designs, while simultaneously providing a distinctive and iconic look. The material is also perfect for intricate and highly-detailed designs, making these headstones another firm favourite.

Sandstone

One of the main benefits of using sandstone for headstones is the ease with which they can be shaped. The material does not, therefore, restrict the stonemason in terms of the shape they’re able to fashion. For people who are looking for a truly bespoke shape to their headstone, sandstone provides a brilliant option.

Other options

There are, of course, a number of other options when it comes to choosing the material for headstones. Several of them are rarely used today, but we’ve listed a few here for those among you who might want to consider something completely different:

• Limestone
• Slate
• Iron
• Wood

Cope Memorials

To hear more about the options we provide here at Cope Memorials, please do not hesitate to get in touch. Our highly-experienced team is incredibly knowledgeable, and will always be more than happy to offer impartial, useful advice.

Call us on 01173 602 187, or fill out one of our online contact forms. We provide our services across Derby, Nottingham, Chesterfield and Burton on Trent.

While memorials should, without doubt, be completely personal, there is sometimes a case for making a more public, well-known one. There are a number of incredibly well-known, high profile memorials throughout the world. Here, we take a brief look at a few of them, and at what makes them so special. 

Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

This is more of a concept than a specific structure. Memorials that simply wish to commemorate unnamed or unknown individuals for their heroic acts are excellent ways of commemorating people. Every continent has one, highlighting the popular nature of this concept. 

The Holocaust Memorial

One of the most high profile memorials in Europe, the holocaust memorial remembers so many people, and yet still manages to represent them as individuals. It comprises of 2, 711 rectangular slabs, and creates a relatively unorganised feeling. This could have been intended to represent the victims’ diversity, but, overall, the monuments’ sombre nature is certainly appropriate for the circumstances. 

The Cenotaph

One of London’s more well-known memorials is the Cenotaph in Whitehall. It was officially unveiled in 1920, and represents the end of the First World War. Cenotaph literally means ‘empty tomb’; it symbolises the unprecedented losses suffered around the world during the conflict. 

Martin Luther King, Jr. memorial

We could have chosen from a great, wide range of respectful, well-designed memorials to honour individuals. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s is one of the more high profile examples, consisting of a stone carving of the man himself. It represents a fitting dedication to a great man, and honours the struggle in America for freedom and equality. 

Arc de Triomphe

Paris’ iconic memorial honours all those who fought and died for France in the Napoleonic and Revolutionary wars. Construction on the Arc began in 1806; it lies at the end of the Champs-Élysées, and remains one of the primary tourist attractions for the city to this day. Interestingly, a tomb of the unknown soldier lies underneath the memorial. 

While we have never been involved in any construction plans of the magnitude mentioned in this post, we are one of the leading stonemasons in the East Midlands. Please do get in touch with us if you require our services; call us on 01773 602 187, or fill out an online contact form. We provide our services across Derby, Nottingham, Chesterfield and Burton on Trent.

What to Consider When Choosing a Cemetery

Whether you are choosing a burial plot for yourself, or for a loved one, there is a lot to consider before doing so. This can be a difficult and overwhelming time, so it is important to arm yourself with as much useful information as possible before going ahead with a quick decision. Firstly, there are a few different types of cemetery available: public cemeteries, independently or corporately owned; religious cemeteries; district or municipal cemeteries, which are non-profit cemeteries; and national or veterans cemeteries, which are run by the government.

We would suggest familiarising yourself with the different options that are available and paying them a visit, you may have one leading plan in your head and completely change your mind when you go to visit in person. Getting a sense for the surrounding grounds, overall area and the staff working there are the main things that can persuade or put you off completely. How well are the grounds being looked after? Is the cemetery in a nice area? How far away is the location from home? These are just some of the important factors to consider before purchasing.

Feel at Ease

When choosing a cemetery and selecting a plot, you want to feel at ease and peaceful when you’re on the grounds. Choosing somewhere calm with a good ambience will give you a sense of relief, knowing your loved one is being laid to rest somewhere tranquil and undisturbed.

Cost and Personal Requests

Selecting the right cemetery that ticks all the right boxes for you may mean you need to compromise certain aspects, which could mean your budget. Additional fees may be added if you have special requests or specific requirements, such as a particular setting or requesting room for further family members to be buried too (purchasing several plots at a time can often be cheaper than buying them individually.) Burial ground fees are calculated on the size of the grave and the costings of the headstone needs to be considered also.

Green Cemetery or Home Burial

Green burials are a modern and forward way of thinking when it comes to funerals and thinking about which cemetery is best for you. For people who are aware and concerned about the environment, lack of land and want to be cost-effective, a green burial has many benefits and advantages towards the environment. Some of these include consuming fewer resources, reduction of carcinogenic fumes, preserving land and preserving wildlife.

Rules and Regulations to Consider

Before making the decision on where you or your loved one would like to be buried, you need to consider the cemetery’s rules and regulations, as each can differ depending on the cemetery. Some of the rules and regulations can include headstone specifications or restrictions, what decorations can and cannot be used and visiting hours may differ. Considering which cemetery to choose to be buried in will always be an intricate process, but it should result in a lovely reflection on the deceased person’s life whatever your family’s wishes may be. 

Contact

If you would like further guidance and advice on choosing the right cemetery for you, or you have any questions about the services we provide, please fill out an online enquiry form, or give us a call today on 01773 602 187 or 07817 187371. We provide our services across Derby, Nottingham, Chesterfield and Burton on Trent.

Green Is the New Black

In the society we live in today, there are plenty of funeral options, but many people are beginning to consider how we can make them more eco-friendly and less damaging to the environment. The prevalent burial process utilises mass amounts of chemicals and materials within the procedure, that end up in the ground. Knowing what the standard burial process is and the damage to the environment it can make, has inspired people to think of alternative ways for a more eco-friendly burial and how we can make a positive impact by choosing to have a green burial.

What Is a Green Burial?

A green burial, or ‘natural burial’ is an alternative way of laying your loved one to rest.  Opposing to the traditional cemetery, this eco-friendly burial process consists of offering a tranquil place for family and friends to visit and reflect, the space will be somewhere open and natural such as a woodland, meadow or field, ultimately being a space that focuses on preserving the organic beauty of the environment and encouraging wildlife and greenery. A green burial does not permit a headstone, as the intention of this is for the body to return to nature. However, there are some examples of biodegradable headstones, or a tree being planted in replacement.

Why Choose a Green Burial?

A green burial is the only sustainable alternative to other forms of burial and cremation. Green burials are a safe, eco-friendly and natural process that is in no way damaging to the environment, unlike the traditional burial procedures. Visitors are always welcome at any time, to enjoy the peace and tranquility and have a beautiful space to think and reflect. It is a lovely way of returning the body back to nature, and is a modern, thoughtful and revolutionary way of burial in comparison to other traditional ways.

Contact

If you are interested in learning more about green burials, or you have any questions about the services we offer here at Cope Memorials, please feel free to get in touch with one of our friendly members of staff, by filling out an online enquiry form, or give us a call on 01773 602187 today. We provide our services across Derby, Nottingham, Chesterfield and Burton on Trent.

A Guide on Funeral Etiquette

When attending a funeral, it is important to be considerate towards the family members’ wishes. Understanding correct funeral etiquette will prepare you to enter a funeral service in a comfortable and respectful way. Important factors to consider before attending a funeral would be what to wear, where to sit, whether you should bring anything with you, and whether it would be appropriate for you to attend. We have put together a few tips within this guide to assist you with all the important fundamentals to remember before entering any funeral service.

What to Wear to a Funeral

Black is the traditional colour for funeral attire due to its representation of mourning and is a sign of respect and the general norm for funeral etiquette. Darker colours and something conservative is always a safe and respectful option to consider. Listen to what the family suggest, as some may request for guests to wear something bright to celebrate their loved one’s life or ask to wear a certain colour in memory of the deceased. Guests are generally required to dress in smart attire. We would suggest avoiding anything too casual, while also making sure you are comfortable and what you are wearing is weather appropriate – especially if you are attending a burial.

What to Bring

Deciding on what to bring to a funeral can be difficult. Whether you are a family member, friend or acquaintance, it’s helpful to know what the right things to bring would be, to avoid feeling uncomfortable throughout the day. Depending on the relationship you had with the deceased and family members, it is always a thoughtful gesture to bring flowers or a sympathy card to show your respects. If you were not particularly close with the family’s loved one, being present and showing that you’re thinking of them by supporting them on the day is just as appropriate and a thoughtful component of acceptable funeral etiquette.

Useful things to remember to bring with you can include:

• Tissues/ Handkerchief 
• Sympathy Card
• Flowers or Charity donation 
• A photograph/ Story/ Memory
• Umbrella/ Sunglasses

Where to Sit

The first couple of rows are typically reserved for close family members. Being respectful by arriving slightly earlier and getting a seat at the back, allowing room for extended family and friends is an important factor to consider. Once seated, remain quiet and dutiful throughout the service until the end.

 What Happens After the Funeral?

 After the majority of most services, the family and funeral directors will have arranged a wake. This is an opportunity for the guests and family to get together and share fond memories over some light refreshments and drinks in either a private function or in the comfort of a family member’s home. This is the perfect opportunity to properly pay your respects or share a memory of the deceased. 

Contact

If you have any other questions regarding proper funeral etiquette, our team at Cope Memorials would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have. For information on the other services we provide, please fill out an online form, or give us a call today on our landline 01773 602 187 or mobile 07817 187371. We provide our services across Derby, Nottingham, Chesterfield and Burton on Trent.

When a loved one passes away, it can be difficult to really put into words exactly how much they mean to you. You want to be able to pay proper tribute and respect, but how can you articulate so many memories and so much emotion faithfully on paper? Creating a eulogy may seem like a daunting and insurmountable task, however there is no need to worry as Cope Memorials are here to help ease the burden. Below we have put together a useful guide to assist our customers when writing and delivering a eulogy.

The Preparation

The planning stage is a crucial component when it comes to writing and delivering a eulogy. Write down significant moments and achievements in the life of the deceased as well as any special memories that you share; this may also mean speaking to other family members and friends to create a well-rounded view of the departed. Pay close attention to important dates or names of people whom you plan on mentioning as these need to be delivered correctly and respectfully. 

Whilst it is important when writing and delivering a eulogy to decide on the overall tone of your tribute, don’t be afraid to share some humor amidst more sombre moments. After all, a funeral is both a time to grieve as well as a time to celebrate the life of your loved one, therefore the whole process can be very cathartic and simultaneously uplifting. 

Writing a Eulogy

Writing down your eulogy will not only help you properly structure your tribute but will also give you an indication of the overall timing and pace of your speech. The ordering of what you say is completely flexible, however we recommend having a clearly defined introduction, middle section and conclusion. For example, you could begin by talking about your fondest memory with the deceased, then go through highlights of their career or family life, ending with how they have impacted the lives of those around them.

Delivering a Eulogy

The overall process of writing and delivering a eulogy is extremely emotional, therefore it is understandable if you find yourself struggling to stem the flow of tears. Take courage and strength from those listening to you, pause for a moment to allow yourself to breathe, and then carry on. Your delivery doesn’t have to be perfect – in fact you may well finding yourself moving back and forth between laughing and crying – just remember to speak from the heart.

The expert team here at Cope Memorials are always on hand to assist our customers with their headstone needs. If your loved one has passed away and you would like further advice and guidance on memorials, don’t hesitate to contact us by calling on 01773 602 187 or by completing our online form.