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Choosing the Right Memorial

Image of a man at a funeral

Choosing the right memorial is never an easy task. Irrespective of the difficulty of finding the right style to match the person in question, having to choose at a tough time personally makes it a very hard thing to do. That is why Cope Memorials have put together a small advice post, to try and get the ball rolling for you. While everyone is unique, there are some basic considerations to take into account before you begin choosing. 

Make it personal 

What stood out about the person in question? What were their defining features, their interests, or their hobbies? These are all very important questions to consider before beginning the decision-making process. If a themed memorial isn’t right for you, then consider what their tastes and try to make your selections based on that. Would they have preferred a black, grey, or white memorial? Did they generally prefer smaller displays of affection, or would they rather have something that stood out? While no-one can answer these questions for you, just thinking about them will get you on the way to making the right choice. 

Ask around

You don’t have to make this decision alone. Talking to other family members and friends will go a long way to making the process easier for you. Reflecting your own and other people’s memories of a person is just as important as reflecting their own tastes and preferences. Discuss your thoughts with people who knew your friend or loved one, and ask them what they think. Just thinking out loud and putting your initial thoughts into words will help a lot; rather than bottling everything up and struggling alone, sharing your ideas with other people should prove useful. 

How do you picture it?

Is there a particular message or style that you picture when you think about the memorial? If so, then try describing it to someone, and talk about how you could get it to work. Think about whether or not you want an inscription at all; while it is conventional to have some sort of writing on a memorial, it is absolutely not compulsory. If you think a simple shape or colour would work better than a message, then there’s no need to stress over finding the right words. Often, the way you initially picture something is close to the best choice. Stressing about a number of different styles and colours only makes things harder. 

Where do you picture it?

Location is almost just as important as the way the memorial looks. If there’s a place you know of that meant something to the person, such as a place they enjoyed going or often talked about, then that’s a good place to start. While memorials aren’t appropriate everywhere, there is likely to be a cemetery relatively close to that special place. Remember, a place that you associate with the person in question is also a great choice. Never forget that your memories matter. 

While we are aware that we can’t choose anything for you, we hope that some of these pointers will have given you a starting point. Ultimately, it is up to the family and friends of a person to decide on their memorial, but the points above give you something to think about while making the decision. If you would like some advice about memorials, or wish to enquire about the services we offer, please give us a call on 01773 602 187 or 07817 187 371, or fill out one of our online contact forms. 

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Guide to the Arnold War Memorial

image of a single poppy in a field

Arnold is a fairly large town in Nottinghamshire, situated in the East Midlands of England. This town has a rich history, known as the birthplace of the Luddite worker rebellion, and the famous Home Brewery.

This town is also home to an interesting war memorial which can be found in Arnot Hill Park (Arnold, Nottingham NG5 6LU). In Cope Memorials latest blog, we’d like to take an in-depth look at the war memorial in Arnold. Cope Memorials specialise in creating beautiful memorials dedicated to the local people of Arnold, and we’d like to explore other well-known memorials in Arnold and the local area.

About the War Memorial in Arnold

The war memorial in Arnold is approximately 4m tall; it is a Celtic wheel cross with intricate carvings on the front. A trapezoid shaped tapering plinth that is mounted on a two-stepped base. The memorial has been constructed from Aberdeen granite.

There are inscriptions located on all four sides of the plinth, detailing the names of both WW1 and WW2 veterans. The war memorial stands on a square area of concrete slabbing, found within a small memorial garden close to the main lake in Arnot Hill Park. The enclosure around the memorial is formed by a small dwarf wall with iron railings.

Further Details About the War Memorial in Arnot Hill Park

Arnot Hill Park is owned by, and the responsibility of, the Borough Gedling Borough Council. This public park is where this war memorial is located in Arnold.

Memorial type: cross

Commemoration: First World War (1914 – 1918), and the Second World War (1939 – 1945).

Total names on the memorial: 252

Maker: Mr W. H. Higginbottom (Architect) and Messrs Thomas Long and Sons (Builder)

Ceremony: Unveiled on the 27th May 1922

Inscription:
IN GRATEFUL MEMORY
OF THE MEN OF ARNOLD
WHO GAVE THEIR LIVES
IN THE GREAT LIVES
IN THE GREAT WAR
1914 – 1918
(NAMES)

AND ALSO OF THOSE WHO LOST THEIR LIVES
DURING THE WAR 1939 – 1945
(NAMES)

How to find the War Memorial in Arnold

Head to: Arnot Hill Park, Arnold, Nottingham, NG5 6LU

How many war memorials are in the UK?

Due to the widespread nature of the nation’s grief here in the UK, there are tens of thousands of war memorials and statues scattered across the country. Historic England is unsure exactly how many there are, but they “listed more than 2,500 war memorials over the centenary period 2014-2018”. 

War memorials make up a poignant part of the UK’s heritage, and they can be found everywhere in almost every town and city. This just shows how widespread and deep the tragic impact of the world wars had on the local communities throughout the country.

Every community set loved ones off to fight and work, and virtually all those communities suffered losses. This grief and sadness created a powerful desire for monuments. According to Historic England, “no greater wave of public remembrance has ever happened in history”.

We hope you found this blog article on the war memorial found in Arnold interesting. 

Contact Cope Memorials

Cope Memorials are an expert team of stonemasons, offering exceptional service in the local areas of Arnold; specifically, to those in need of beautifully crafted headstones and memorials. To speak with our caring and considerate team, please give us a call on 01773 602 187 or complete our simple online enquiry form, and we’ll be in touch.

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10 Ideas for Gravesite Visitations

image of a gravestone with flowers

Everybody treats gravesite visitations differently. We all experience different emotions, thoughts and feelings when dealing with grief and thinking about the loss of a loved one. You may even be wondering whether you should visit a relative’s gravesite.

Sometimes, a visit to a cemetery can be cathartic, a time of healing, reflection, sharing memories, saying prayers or goodbye, or simply as an act of remembrance. Whatever the reason, it is a worthwhile visit. 

Are you wondering what to do when visiting a gravesite? Here are 10 ideas for your next cemetery visitation.

10 Ideas for a Gravesite Visitation

  1. Bring flowers and lie the bouquet on the headstone 
  2. Decorate the grave with pictures of the deceased, flowers, memorabilia and art 
  3. Kneel down next to the headstone and pray 
  4. Practice meditation and begin to let the healing process happen 
  5. Speak to your deceased loved one, tell them about your life, what you’ve been up to, how much miss them or recount lovingly and nostalgically about the memories you shared together 
  6. If you visited the tombstone with family members or friends, remember the good times you shared with your deceased loved one – the laughs, the love and the challenges you faced together 
  7. If you’re visiting with family or friends, share meaningful quotes, song lyrics, recite from the bible 
  8. If you’re visiting with family or friends, have fun and joke around. You can also use this time to plan for the future as well as reflect on the past 
  9. If you’re visiting with family or friends, together you can discuss each other’s health and reflect on your own mortality 
  10. If you brought lunch with you, or a snack, you can sit at a nearby bench and take in the beauty of nature that surrounds you. Take the time to be present, listen to the birdsongs, wind ruffling through the trees, and looking around at the landscape of headstones in all their different shapes, sizes and colours

 

If you’ve travelled far for the gravesite visitation, you can make it truly commemorative by having a stroll around the cemetery grounds. This gives you the opportunity to reflect on your loved one’s memorial, while also observing how others are memorialised and remembering their loved ones. 

Alongside taking a walk around the grounds, you can also take the time to clean the monument before you leave. It is always best to check the condition of your loved one’s headstone. While it takes thousands of years for a granite headstone to show deterioration, it can become soiled and stained. Often due to moss or mildew, leaves and twigs or the build up of animal and bird droppings.

During your gravesite visit you can clean the monument and beautify the plot by easily brushing off dirt, sticks and grass. For a better clean, you can bring soap, water and a cloth for a more efficient and thorough clean. Cemeteries cut the grass and trim the area around the gravestone and plot, but if you’d like the monument to look beautiful, this is your responsibility.

When do people typically visit a gravesite?

You can carry out a gravesite visitation anytime you feel compelled to do so. But, there are special times of year when people typically visit a cemetery, such as on Remembrance Day, Christmas Day, a wedding anniversary, a birthday, the anniversary of their death, Easter Sunday, a day of a special event you shared together, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day or Valentine’s Day.

There are a number of different reasons why you might visit the gravesite of a loved one, and equally, so many things you can do while there to help you reconnect with the one you lost, remember them, and feel close again. It is a heartfelt moment visiting a grave and one that is very personal. We hope that some of the ideas shared here will help you next time you visit your loved ones gravesite, and help keep the beautiful memories of them alive.

Contact Cope Memorials

Here at Cope Memorials, we’re an expert team of stonemasons, offering an exceptional service in the local areas of Chesterfield, Burton-on-Trent, Ripley, Wilford, Belper, Derby, Alfreton, Buwell, Chaddesden, Nottingham, and Arnold; specifically, to those in need of beautifully crafted headstones and memorials. To speak with our caring and considerate team, please give us a call on 01773 602 187 or complete our simple online enquiry form, and we’ll be in touch.

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What Is An Online Memorial?

image of old photos of people

Online memorials have become increasingly popular over the last decade – millions of people have created one for their departed loved one as a way to recognise and remember them.

What is an online memorial?

An online memorial is a website that has been created for a deceased person. It provides a central location for family and friends to visit, share stories, fond memories, photos, as well as comfort one another and grieve.

The memorial can remember online for life or be available only for a specific period of time.

Originally, online memorials surfaced on the internet during the late 1990s, predominantly for well-known people in the world. This has now evolved into being available online for anyone who wishes to pay tribute to their departed loved one and ensure they are remembered.

What is included on an online memorial website?

Typically, the content published on an online memorial includes a biography, photos, and any stories posted from family members and friends. This can also be extended to include a timeline of key events in their life, along with any favourite music, and even videos.

Other features include visitors sending condolences and support in the form of candles and acceptance of thoughts. Furthermore, some online memorials also direct visitors to the departed person’s favourite charity or cause, encouraging visitors to make a donation as an alternative to sending funeral flowers.

How can I make an online memorial?

Website memorials

There are two ways in which you can make an online memorial. Either create your own independent site, or by using an established memorial site, which is what many choose to do. Memorial sites are easy to use, create and personalise; it can be done in less than 30 minutes.

Social Media memorials

Alternatively, you remove or turn the deceased person’s Facebook profile into a memorial for free when you show proof of death. Once a Facebook page is memorialised, any sensitive information will be removed, but friends and family can still post memories or condolences.

You can also turn Instagram accounts into memorial pages. On Twitter, you can request to get your departed loved ones profile removed or deactivated.

Contact Cope Memorials

Here at Cope Memorials, we’re always more than happy to help you choose the right type of headstone, all you need to do is get in touch. You can give us a call on 01773 602 187, or fill out our online contact form.

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Times Are Changing: A Guide to 21st Century Modern Funerals

image of a white coffin inside a funeral vehicle

In recent times, we have seen a transformation in the way funeral services are conducted. For starters, modern funerals have become much more personal and tailored to the deceased individual. There are increased options for getting personalised coffins, choosing from a wide range of funeral cars, as well as many other customisable options.

What does a modern funeral look like?

Celebration of life

The 21st Century mindset and attitude towards funerals and death has shifted; today, we view funerals and funeral planning as an opportunity to celebrate life, rather than mourn it. Increasingly, modern funerals are non-religious with many also choosing to be cremated rather than buried.

Humour used as an uplifting way to mourn and connect the room

In conjunction with modern funerals becoming more of a celebration of life, there are often jokes and humour added to eulogies. The idea behind this is to encourage friends, family and loved ones to laugh at fond memories and stories, remembering the good and using humour as a way to connect with others also grieving. By making people laugh, we can mourn together and channel our grief into remembering and bonding over everything we loved about our departed loved one.

Colourful, personalised celebration

To celebrate life, it is becoming increasingly popular to use colour throughout the funeral service. This is often seen in the form of colourful clothing, rather than the traditional black attire. But also, there has been a rise in colourful and beautifully decorated coffins and personalised decor at the wake too. Often, these colourful injections of life and personality are following the wishes of the deceased.

Music collection rather than hymns

Nowadays, when planning a funeral we often decide to play songs that are personal, or favourites of our deceased loved one. This is to play homage to their memory, and take a minute to enjoy songs they loved and remind us of them. This is a far more personable way for mourners to celebrate life at a funeral, rather than commonly selected traditional funeral songs and hymns.

Expanding and unconventional cremation and burial options

Alongside changing the way in which modern funerals are carried out, there has also been a variety of different and unconventional funeral requests that have appeared in our time. Some people are deciding to donate their body to medical science, or have their cremated remains turned into something else such as diamonds and family heirloom jewellery.

For many years, burials were the most popular form of funeral, however with the gradual shift towards cremations, people are considering other alternatives. There are certain charitable organisations which now turn remains into an ocean reef (known as ‘eternal reefs’), in order to create new marine habitats and replace natural reefs that have been damaged.

Reportedly, there has also been a rise in Viking funerals within the UK; presumably, due to the popularity in fantasy TV shows such as Game of Thrones and Vikings. For legal reasons within the UK, a body must be cremated before the remains are placed onto a miniature scaled Viking boat and set alight while it sails away.

For the more eco-conscious amongst us, there has also been a rise in eco-friendly burials (also known as ‘burials pods’ or ‘burial urns’). This allows human remains to be buried beneath a tree. The carbon remains help the tree to grow and serve as an alternative to a headstone.

Contact Cope Memorials

Here at Cope Memorials we understand how important it is to say goodbye to your loved one in a way which is personal and special to you. For beautiful and bespoke memorials and headstones, please contact our expert team of stonemasons by calling 01773 602 187 or by completing our quick and simple online contact form.

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Using Meditation And Mindfulness For Funerals & Grief

When dealing with grief or attending a funeral there are a few things that you can do to make the day a little easier. By practising grief meditation and mindfulness it can be helpful when you’re experiencing feelings of great sadness or the memories of a deceased loved one are disrupting your life and making it difficult to perform everyday tasks.

Grief meditation

To help the bereaved cope with sadness and stress, grief meditation is often used. This practice involves spending a period of time, or even just a few seconds, focusing on being present and in the moment, while not engaging in distracting thoughts.

This type of meditation can be practised to help with attending a funeral right through to coping with daily life after a loved one has died. Grief meditation can help everyone, but it’s particularly beneficial to those coping with grief or attending a funeral.

Mindfulness

Mindfulness is similar to grief meditation, however, this involves being in a state of great focus on the individual’s present moment, acknowledging unpleasant and painful feelings and thoughts (such as grief and sadness), but actively choosing not to be distracted or distressed by them.

This meditation practice has become increasingly more popular over the last few years and it is often used for cognitive-behavioural therapy. It is recommended by the NHS to improve your mental well-being.

Mindfulness can be practised anywhere and everywhere, from sitting at home in your bedroom, to at your desk at work, while shopping or even when playing sports. The most important thing to remember is that you cannot force yourself to be mindful and trying too hard has the opposite effect.

Contact Cope Memorials

We realise that this short blog won’t have made what you’re going through any easier, but hopefully, it will provide you with a foundation for different meditative options available to you when coping with grief. Here at Cope Memorials, we’re always more than happy to help you choose the right type of headstone, all you need to do is get in touch. You can give us a call on 01773 602 187, or fill out our online contact form.

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Online Memorial Websites & Social Media Profiles

Online memorials have become increasingly popular over the last decade – millions of people have created one for their departed loved one as a way to recognise and remember them.

What is an online memorial?

An online memorial is a website that has been created for a deceased person. It provides a central location for family and friends to visit, share stories, fond memories, photos, as well as comfort one another and grieve.

The memorial can remember online for life or be available only for a specific period of time.

Originally, online memorials surfaced on the internet during the late 1990s, predominantly for well-known people in the world. This has now evolved into being available online for anyone who wishes to pay tribute to their departed loved one and ensure they are remembered.

What is included on an online memorial website?

Typically, the content published on an online memorial includes a biography, photos, and any stories posted from family members and friends. This can also be extended to include a timeline of key events in their life, along with any favourite music, and even videos.

Other features include visitors sending condolences and support in the form of candles and acceptance of thoughts. Furthermore, some online memorials also direct visitors to the departed person’s favourite charity or cause, encouraging visitors to make a donation as an alternative to sending funeral flowers.

How can I make an online memorial?

Website memorials

There are two ways in which you can make an online memorial. Either create your own independent site, or by using an established memorial site, which is what many choose to do. Memorial sites are easy to use, create and personalise; it can be done in less than 30 minutes.

Social Media memorials

Alternatively, you remove or turn the deceased person’s Facebook profile into a memorial for free when you show proof of death. Once a Facebook page is memorialised, any sensitive information will be removed, but friends and family can still post memories or condolences.

You can also turn Instagram accounts into memorial pages. On Twitter, you can request to get your departed loved ones profile removed or deactivated.

Contact Cope Memorials

Here at Cope Memorials, we’re always more than happy to help you choose the right type of headstone, all you need to do is get in touch. You can give us a call on 01773 602 187, or fill out our online contact form.

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How Different Countries Celebrate Remembrance Day

Throughout the United Kingdom, and other countries that make up The Commonwealth, Remembrance Day is celebrated on the 11th November. It is a day that marks the anniversary of the end of fighting in World War I. Here in the UK, we observe it by assembling for two minutes of silence beginning at 11am. Poppies have also become the symbol of the day, and wreaths of them are laid out at war memorials as well as artificial ones worn on clothing.

Here are some other nations across the world that celebrate their version of Remembrance, or Memorial Day.

DODENHERDENKING – THE NETHERLANDS

In The Netherlands, Dodenherdenking (which means ‘remembrance of the dead’) is held every year on the 4th May. This day celebrates all civilians and military members who died in conflicts since World War II. It is observed throughout the country with a two minutes silence at 8pm and even public transportation is halted.

ARMISTICE DAY – BELGIUM

In Belgium, they also celebrate Armistice Day on the 11th November to mark the anniversary of the end of World War I. The country uses this day to remember all the fallen soldiers.

VOLKSTRAUERTAG – GERMANY

This day is celebrated on whichever Sunday falls closest to the 16th November and honours the dead. There was a brief period, when Germany was under Nazi rule, that this day was used for propaganda and turned from a day of remembrance to a day of hero worship.

VICTORY DAY – RUSSIA

This is a holiday in Russia that commemorates the surrender of Nazi Germany in 1945. It is observed by military parades, mass processions, gatherings at monuments and religious commemorations.

YOM HAZIKARON – ISRAEL

This is a memorial day observed in Israel for the fallen soldiers of the wars of Israel and for victims of actions of terrorism. The day opens with a one-minute siren the preceding evening at 8pm. During which, everyone commemorates by standing in silence and showing respect. By law all places of entertainment close on the eve of Yom Hazikaron. The names and ranks of every fallen soldier who died for Israel are displayed in a 24-hour broadcast on television.

QINGMING FESTIVAL (清明节) – CHINA

Qingming Festival, known as ‘Tomb-Sweeping Day’ in English, falls on the first day of the fifth solar term in the traditional Chinese calendar. This is a day where families visit the tombs of their ancestors. Whilst visiting they make ritual offerings, pray and clean the gravesites. Offerings include eating traditional dishes and the burning of joss sticks and joss paper.

Qingming Festival has been observed in China for over 2,500 years and became a public holiday in mainland China in 2008. This festival is also observed in several other surrounding countries, including Taiwan, Hong Kong, Macau, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia and Thailand.

DÍA DE MUERTOS – MEXICO

Día de Muertos, known as ‘day of the dead’ in English, is celebrated throughout Mexico and involves the gathering of friends and family to pray for and remember friends or family members who have died and help support their spiritual journey. In Mexican culture, death is viewed as a natural part of the human cycle. Therefore, it is now seen as a day of sadness, but one of celebration instead as their deceased loved ones awaken and celebrate with them. Día de Muertos has been observed in Mexico for as long as 2,500 – 3,000 years.

ANZAC DAY – AUSTRALIA & NEW ZEALAND

Anzac Day (April 25th) is the anniversary of the first major military action fought by Australian and New Zealand forces during World War I. It begins with commemorative services, followed by marches of former military personnel.

MEMORIAL DAY – UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

Memorial Day, previously known as ‘Decoration Day’, in America is a federal holiday dedicated to honouring and mourning the military personnel who have died while serving in the United States armed forces.

Contact Us

Cope Memorials specialise in designing and building memorials for your loved one. We’re always more than happy to help you choose the right type of headstone, all you need to do is get in touch. You can give us a call on 01773 602 187, or fill out our online contact form.